For many of us, it has now been more than forty days of quarantine, and, well, its getting real! As the Covid 19 pandemic is changing the world as we know it, the stay-at-home orders are making a mark on our love life in the collective. As I continue to provide virtual dating and relationship coaching-as well as tele-therapy- for singles and couples, I’m learning a lot about the dating and relationship climate during these unprecedented times.
Here are some of the trends that I have seen:
1.The desire for love and connection really is here to stay, but the ways in which it is being expressed is definitely changing. Yes, people are still swiping away and figuring out how to form romantic connections with video chats, phone calls, text messages, surprise deliveries, socially distant walks, drive-by celebrations, and even drones. Since you can’t chase someone down and make-out in the airport right now-like you would if you were the star of a romantic comedy, of course- it is time to get creative. Masks: Required!
2. Common sense still applies. Single ladies: If he’s just not that into you, he’s just not that into you—and, you will be able to tell. Even if you aren’t quarantined together. If you want a reminder for your refrigerator, these are the things a relationship-oriented man with genuine interest in you should be doing during the early stages of dating.
3. People are seeing the good in their situation—no matter what their status. Some singles are using the time to develop themselves, and be glad they aren’t quarantined with their ex! Others are realizing the benefits of dating from home. No commute. No bill. No pants with zippers. No awkward kiss goodnight. Some couples are realizing that they haven’t killed each other yet; to their amazement, they actually kind of like the bond that develops from being “safe at home” 24/7!
4. That being said, some people are getting really, really, frustrated with their partner. The longer they are home together, the more those annoying habits become more and more annoying! Balancing the “we” time with the “me” time can be extra challenging when one day looks the same as the next, and the weeks kind of just blur together. Fundamental differences are highlighted; emotions are strong. Tension, high.
5. Communication is getting awkward for everyone. For those doing virtual dating, it is more challenging than ever not to turn their video dates into job interviews! Once people do manage to start chatting regularly with someone they may like, it can be hard to keep the conversation going with new romantic prospect. Some who are living simply feel here’s only so many times you can ask what one made for dinner or watched on Netflix. Again, creativity is king here—as is having a personality. No one can rely on just looks anymore; some are discovering they really don’t know how to have meaningful conversations with strangers. Sadly, others are finding out that they have nothing to talk about with the person who has been sleeping next to them for the past two decades. Still others say it is hard to tell the new partner sitting right next to them that they just want them to……go away.
All of this is pretty darn normal during quarantine life, but for some, the impact on their dating or relationship is more problematic than for others. Yes, this too shall pass, but in the meantime……
If you need help coping, there’s good news: I am offering complimentary consultations for all new potential dating and relationship coaching clients and discounted sessions for everyone during the pandemic and into the near future. Book your strategy session here.
The other day, I announced on my social media that it was official: I am working from home indefinitely for all of my business ventures!
Yes, I feel grateful that I am still able to help flatten the curve-even if it decreases my revenue- by offering remote services including:
-Phone & Video-based dating and relationship coaching for singles and couples
-Tele-therapy for singles, couples, and families
-Virtual matchmaking for singles
-Teaching an online training course to aspiring matchmakers and reviewing their business plans at Matchmaking Institute.
The practice of gratitude is something that I have talked about a lot to my clients and followers. Its for you, its for me, its for everyone! Its even for my clients who are so sweetly offering me these lovely, unsolicited testimonials!
Gratitude is especially for us during uncertain times like these of the coronavirus pandemic. I am seeing that some people need it more than ever.In a sense, I feel that I am on the front lines too, because, I am hearing first person accounts of how singles and couples are struggling—whether alone or with their partner.
At this time, I challenge you all to express gratitude. Every morning, write down three things that you are grateful for. If you are frustrated with your partner, write down three things that you grateful for about him or her. (This could really prevent you from killing each other during quarantine!)
Do this for thirty days. See the difference. And, in the meantime, of course, stay as positive as you can. You got this!
We are in some interesting times, indeed, in the United States and globally.
Like many small businesses, at Rachel Russo Relationships, I am trying to find a better way to serve singles who may be concerned about exposure to the coronavirus.
Virtual dating, anyone? Remote coaching sessions to discuss how to actually succeed at a virtual date in an age in which people have forgotten how to talk on the phone?
People have been asking my thoughts on how coronavirus is impacting the dating world. I will start with this: If you are single and think there is ever a good time to hook up with a random stranger from Tinder, it should not be now!
Last week, I wasn't so sure how love lives would be impacted. This week, as I have done more research on the health concerns, have seen the way people and governments are handling this worldwide, and considered the economic consequences:
Yes, I think that some people will be impacted in a considerable way---especially in areas where there has been real exposure.
So, for once, I agree with Tinder, in that they issued a health-comes-first message.
I know a lot of people are panicking and a lot of people are minimizing this. However, for those of us with autoimmune issues, those of us who are older, and those of us who care enough not to spread a disease in their family and community: It isn't always just "wash your hands for twenty seconds".
I was sadden to see that there was a record jump in coronavirus infections in Italy yesterday, and to hear what is going on within the healthcare system there.
As an Italian American, I know that Italians are strong, and I feel they are doing the right thing with country wide lockdowns. I think other countries should consider following their lead, and, that, we in the US shouldn’t be foolish enough to believe that the virus is not a real threat.
We should all do our part to prevent the spread of illness and impact on our communities. Personally, I would not mind being quarantined for a couple weeks if it was going to help. (As long as I have WiFi!) Yes, flirting in 2020 may be: “Anyone want to get quarantined with me?!😉”
Its, for many of us, time to #PrayForItaly and #PrayForTheWorld. So, I ask you to think about how the coronavirus may be impacting people's love lives. Do you have any ideas for how I may be able to better serve you and/or others? Feel free to email me some ideas at Rachel@RachelRusso.com
But, mostly, think of this: Why not prepare for the worst, hope for the best, and, of, course, wash our hands for thirty seconds?
So I have some exciting news to share! At Rachel Russo Relationships, I've recently launched a brand-new product on my Services page: Email Coaching!
I created this for anyone who wishes they could have dating and relationship advice from a professional, at an affordable price, on demand.
If you could really use some extra hand-holding in your love life-and your friends and family aren't cutting it, aren't objective enough, or are sick and tired of hearing your dating mishaps and relationships sagas- I think you are going to love, love, love this!
Check this out: You can can have me in your inbox every single day, answering all of your burning questions! This is a month-to-month-service that you can try out one month at a time for an investment of five hundred dollars. What's included? Other than life-changing advice that can help you cope and actually learn to love your love life--no matter what your status? Well, you can email up to three questions per day, every day if you wish to. I will send you detailed, personalized, responses in a timely fashion--even on the weekends!
Don't like writing? Would you prefer to listen to-instead of read-my advice? You are in luck, because you can alternately send me voice notes, and I'll answer you back--in voice notes.
My current clients are really appreciating this new service-and the accountability it creates-and I am thrilled to extend this special offer to you! If you are ready to get started, you can sign up for Email Coaching here and send your first round of email questions-or phone number for voice notes-to Rachel@RachelRusso.com. If you have any questions about Email Coaching, feel free to message me or schedule a complimentary consultation before signing up.
Can't wait to discover how what I know can help you have everything that you've always wanted--in love!
Can we talk about #HalftimeShow2020?
With a look at social media, I read way too many posts from both men and women-honestly more from men-that included both positive and negative comments on the physical appearance of both JLo & Shakira.
I’m all for free speech, but some of the negative comments from men on my Facebook page caused me to delete some of my “friends”. (The purge felt good!)
Our culture’s hyper-focus on womens’ bodies and overall appearance hurts both women, men, and the state of our romantic relationships.
Of course, it isn’t just men who are criticizing women in this way. Judging by my feed, more men were doing this last night. Maybe its just that more were watching The Super Bowl and posting about it. Maybe women were watching and criticizing privately? I don’t know. But I do know that this form of toxic masculinity is real. And that a lot of women are also guilty of accepting this and making such comments themselves.
When I see women criticizing other women in this way, it is a whole other kind of maddening! As if we don’t get enough criticism from men, we have to do it to ourselves —and publicly while we are at it? This is no bueno.
This type of dialogue is this stuff that helps make women with low self-esteem, poor body image, eating disorders, depression, anxiety, and tolerance for relationship abuse.
This is a good time for me to say once again: We ladies need to support each other instead of tearing each other down!
I am helping to do my part, this Saturday, February 8th, by co-hosting a special event, Galentine’s Day 2020, for single women looking for love, with my friend & colleague, Love Coach Junie Moon.
The event takes place in the Valley & Bloom Lounge in Montclair, from 4-6PM.
We will be sharing all we know that can help women stay away from limiting beliefs, unhealthy behaviors, and toxic men so that they can find and keep a healthy and amazing relationship!
To learn more about our event and buy tickets, check out our the link here.
Sixteen days into 2020, and I have some exciting announcements for you! There will be a lot of changes for me personally and professionally this year and throughout the decade. I am happy to have you along for the ride! If you are not already following my journey, feel free to do so on Instagram or Facebook.
Happy New Year & Best Wishes for "The Roaring 20s" from our family to yours! Also, today is World Introvert Day; so a special shout out to all the introverts among us who are likely dying to recharge after all the craziness of the holiday season!
For the "single" introvert: If you haven't tried professional matchmaking, it could be a dream for you! With personalized introductions, you don't have to have awkward small talk with people you meet at bars or go on draining dates with people you meet online--who look nothing like their photos.
If you are very serious about finding someone special, there are few things better than being proactive about it by hiring a qualified professional to personally handpick, recruit, and vet potential matches for you. Many of us matchmakers, we don’t mess around; background checks are included!
I am currently accepting new clients, but if we are not a “match”, I can happily refer you to one of the matchmakers in my vast international network of love professionals. If you are in the NYC area and aren’t ready to hire a matchmaker but would like to be considered for introductions, feel free to apply to my confidential matchmaking database at www.RachelRusso.com. Curious to learn more? Go ahead, email me!
By the way, if you are curious about the matchmaking industry from a business perspective-and are looking for a career change in the new year-feel free to get in touch. Not only am I still hiring recruiters-and offering everyone generous commissions for referring single friends-but I am still teaching online and live classes with Matchmaking Institute. I will be teaching at The Global Love Conference in NYC this March. More info here.
Meantime, as a reminder: I am offering a New Year's Special Strategy Session for singles, couples, half-couples--anyone who could use some fresh perspective for finding or keeping love. Note: I also do strategy sessions for entrepreneurs interested in matchmaking, and I am happy to extend the offer to you. My Strategy Sessions can be life-changing! And when booked before Jan 20, 2020, they are now twenty-percent off.
If you wish to jumpstart your success in love and life during These Roaring Twenties, click here to learn more, and reserve your spot on my calendar today. Have a healthy, happy, and prosperous New Year!
As the year comes to an end, I am reflecting back on what I have experienced both personally and professionally. While I could tell you all about my alternative medicines, gluten-free everything, and adventures and misadventures in business and love, I'll close off 2019 with one piece of relationship advice for you.
If I could only offer you one nugget of wisdom of creating a beautiful, new beginning for your love life for the next year and decade to come, it would be this.....
Make a real, strong effort to do all those things that you know- deep down-that you must do to achieve your desired outcome in the romance department. Do those uncomfortable things that could propel your forward to meet the right potential partners or strengthen the relationship that you already have. Just do them. Stop procrastinating! It is 2020 for God's sake! Do them now.
To get started pondering what needs to change, ask yourself: What do I need to leave behind? Here are my thoughts on the things everyone could benefit from ditching in the new year:
1. Focusing on the negative about your love life: This will bring nothing but more negativity to your dating/ relationship experience.
2. Holding on to anger from the past: Whether you are carrying around negative feelings toward your ex or your current partner, this is self-sabotage.
3. Clinging to the hope of getting back together with an ex: Don’t hold your breath. If they truly wanted to be with you, they would be with you.
4. Watching your ex’s Insta stories: See # 2.
5. Being unrealistic with your match criteria or having too high of expectations in your relationship: This can keep you single or unhappily coupled for a long, long time.
6. Comparing your love life to that of your parents/siblings/friends/co-workers/exes: You are in competition with no one. And all that glitters isn’t gold, so don’t be fooled by those happily-ever-after social media posts.
7. Ignoring someone you are dating/ in a relationship with because it seems easier than telling the truth: You’ll create a much healthier dynamic if you can learn to get comfortable having uncomfortable conversations.
8. Ghosting: Don't be a coward. Whether you had three dates with someone or spent three years of your life, give them the common courtesy of properly ending the relationship.
9. Expecting the other person to read your mind: Communicate what you want to increase the chances of getting it. No one should have to play guessing games.
Out with the old, in with the new, right?
I know it is easier said than done, and that is why I am offering a New Year's Special Strategy Session for anyone who is interested in getting a little support along the way. My Strategy Sessions can be life-changing! And when booked before Jan 20, 2020, they are now twenty-percent off. If you are truly ready to make 2020 YOUR year-and to stop saying that every year-click here to learn more and reserve your spot on my calendar today.
In the meantime, have a safe and happy New Year's Eve, and best wishes for The Roaring 20s!
Happy Thanksgiving, Everyone!
A few things that I wanted to share in honor of the holiday:
My “attitude of gratitude”: I find that practicing gratitude is one of the best things that we can do to caterpillar our success in love and life! Writing down three things a day that I am grateful for everyday has truly impacted me in a positive way. It has definitely brought me more things to be grateful for, and I encourage you to try it and unlock the door to deeper gratitude for you!
Today, I’m feeling most grateful for my family, my health & wellness, and the fact that I’m in a sustainable and rewarding career that has been all about helping people find & keep love for fifteen years now! (Sometimes, re: the latter, I’m like: Wow. It really is cool that I’ve got to do this for so long! What an honor to help people like this.)
I want to show my gratitude for YOU! Whether you have been following me for years or following me for a day, I am thankful for you! I’d truly be honored to be a part of your journey to finding and/or keeping love. In that spirit, I’m offering two Thanksgiving Day Specials at Rachel Russo Relationships for you. Read on........
From now through Dec 1rst, you can book a Strategy Session for half the price! That’s one hour of coaching-phone or video call-for just $125. Let’s talk!
Want more support from me? The holidays are the perfect time for Email Coaching. You can try one month at twenty percent off when booked before Dec 1rst. That’s $400 for the opportunity to pick my brain everyday via email. If you have a lot of burning questions and could use someone to keep you on track in your love life, this is an incredible value that can be a total game-changer!
For more details on either special offer, visit the link here or email me at Rachel@RachelRusso.com with questions.
Have a fantastic holiday!😘
I attended my cousin's wedding this week in Northern, NJ; I had a wonderful time with family--including my mother and sister, pictured with me here.
Weddings have a way of causing us to reflect upon our own happily-ever-after- or lack thereof- don't they? Do you ever wonder what the secret is to finding a quality partner and creating a sustainable, fulfilling love life?
While I don't have it all figured out, I have a lot of insight on this "secret". The truth is, there are strategies that can help anyone improve his or her love life--no matter who they are or what their age is.
Let’s face it. Many believe that age makes finding love harder. Being in the second half of life and getting “back out there” can feel daunting. I work with many clients in a matchmaking and dating coaching capacity who have struggled to start over as a single in midlife. Getting over exes and breakups is half the battle.
But, gosh, it seems so hard for many to just find someone appealing who offers basic respect and genuine interest these days. If you fall into this category and have been dealing with these types for too long, check out my thoughts on how to move forward here.
With divorce rates skyrocketing and people feeling more dissatisfied in partnership than ever before, and being in midlife after multiple sucky relationships, I understand why one would think it isn’t possible to have a fulfilling relationship let alone find one so late in life. But this isn't true; it is just a limiting belief.
Click here to read more what I have to say about limiting beliefs at this time.
Would you rather hear me talk about how to have dating success in midlife? You can check out my episode on a recent podcast, Midlife Love Out Loud: Your One Stop Love Shop, hosted by my friend and colleague, Junie Moon, the Love Coach. This podcast could be a great resource for you!
Midlife Love Out Loud offers topics for women-which could also be helpful for men-like: