Finding happiness in relationships is more of an art than a science. When it comes to matters of the heart, the advice that I give as a Dating + Relationship Coach and Matchmaker is not one-size-fits all.
While it is beneficial to be creative in the way that you manage your love life, it is dangerous to keep making the same mistakes that I see so many people making today.
Throughout my thirteen-year career in this industry, I have talked to thousands of people about their love life. I have noticed many trends among unhappy singles and couples. Attitudes and behaviors that sabotage everything.
If you aren't getting what you want in your life, I'd be willing to bet that you may be guilty of one of the following love-related "sins".
1. You are unrealistic in your expectations.
If I had a penny for every time I met a single person who was unrealistic about who he or she wanted to date........
To be brutally honest, a lot of singles I know fail to realize that the people they most want to date don't want to date them.
Could you be unaware of the type of men or women that would find your most desirable? If so, you are likely to be going after all the wrong people. We should talk.
To find a successful relationship, you have to be aware of both what you want in partner and what you bring to the table.
If you don't have an understanding of this, you really need a dating expert such as myself to help you understand the dating market. I liken this to real estate. When you are looking for a house, you tell the broker what you are looking for and you hope to get it. But you soon learn that the broker knows the real estate market way better than you. Unfortunately, sometimes, what you thought you could get for your money isn't what you could actually get.
The dating game is no different.....
And can we talk about when you are in a relationship?
Please, people, you have to keep your expectations in check! A lot of you lovelies are just as unreasonable when coupled.
You expect your partner to meet all of your needs, and you know, never do anything that hurts you......
(Sorry. Doesn't work that way!)
2. You have not learned the lessons from your past.
As I said in my recent interview--published in the blog at Rx Breakup here......
It is so important to get over the past in order to move forward in love. That’s why I wrote my book, How To Get Over Your Ex: A Step By Step Guide To Mend A Broken Heart Italian American Style. I could talk about this stuff 24/7!
So many lessons will repeat themselves if you do not learn them. In fact, you may find yourself dating the same person over and over--in slightly different packaging.
You must work on accepting that your relationship is over, and that there is no turning back. If you do not STAY AWAY FROM YOUR EX–unless you absolutely have to be in contact- you just further delay moving forward.
If you do not do the work that is necessary to heal your heart, you will bring a lot of unhealthy baggage into your next relationship.
And I promise you, this will not get you what you want in your love life.
3. You are wasting your time in the wrong relationship or no relationship at all.
FACT: A lot of people are wasting their time when it comes to dating and relationships.
My clients. My friends. The random girl at the bar. You reading this newsletter.
I see you.
I have talked to some of you this past week after you read my "Are you wasting your time?" blog and found the courage to book that complimentary Matchmaking/ Dating & Relationship consultation that I am currently offering.
Remember: Every minute that you spend with the wrong person is a minute less that you get to spend with the right person.
And if you really want a relationship but are spending your time with no person:
What the **** are you doing with your life? How long are you going to keep making excuses?
Time stops for no one.
You have to look yourself in the eye and be honest. Do you need to stop fooling yourself and end your relationship already? Do you need a coach to kick your butt and get that profile online again? Do you need a matchmaker to find you your match? Or do you just need to do something-anything-to get momentum.
If you've always do what you've always done, you'll always have what you always got.
And, clearly, that won't get you what you want in your love life.
PS: If you are ready to stop making these mistakes and start getting what you want in your love life, book that complimentary Matchmaking & Dating/Relationship Coaching Consultation today. Finding happiness in relationships is more of an art than a science. When it comes to matters of the heart, the advice that I give as a Dating + Relationship Coach and Matchmaker is not one-size-fits all.
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© Copyright Rachel Russo
Rachel Russo Relationships, LLC
28 Valley Road Suite 1
Montclair, New Jersey