Yesterday, one of my single girlfriends in NYC texted: “There’s a million ways to find a date, but it’s so hard to find The One.”
Considering all of the online dating websites, singles events, dating events, reality shows, and matchmakers out there. I couldn’t agree more! There are lots of people going on lots of dates and still getting nowhere close to finding that special person they could spend the rest of their life with. What gives?
In my experience, many singles are searching for someone who doesn’t exist.
They think that there’s no one available that is good enough to date and are always finding fault with the people that are interested in dating them.
There are plenty of other singles who are content with their partner in the early stages of dating, but get “antsy” after a couple months, because they have a fear that they are missing out on someone who could be better for them. Or maybe it is a fear of intimacy. Or commitment.
The common denominator here is that there are a lot of single people getting in their own way.
I am willing to bet that many of these singles could be happier than they think if they just pick someone who is compatible and settle down with them already!
That’s right: My suggestion for finding and keeping The One is to just choose to make a relationship work with the one who is good enough for you!
I’ve been such a fan of the A&E reality show, Married At First Sight, where strangers marry at first sight, for that very reason: There’s something to be said for turning your head away from all of the other options out in the world who could possibly be a match for you in favor of just picking one to tie the knot with. (By the way, I am going to be sharing my thoughts with you on the last episode of this season’s MAFS after it airs Tuesday night, so stay tuned!) This unique reality show has confirmed my belief that one of the most crucial factors in finding and keeping The One is having the mindset that there is someone out there good enough for you to care about for the long term.
The truth is: If you are truly committed to caring about one person and making it work, that person can become The One. Remember that no matter how frustrating your search may seem, you only need one!
If you have found "The One" by changing your mindset, leave a comment on the blog or email me with your success story at Rachel@RachelRusso.com.
6/6/2015 05:53:21 am
You are right again. Some people have what I call Seinfeld Syndrome, where they practically wait for the appearance of the "disqualifying trait" in their date. The difference is that on that show they had a good excuse, because it allowed for many different storylines.
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Rachel Russo Relationships, LLC
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