They Just Don't Get It

Most people are full of it when it comes to giving others love advice. 

So if you have a friend or family member whose advice is always on point, treasure them like the rare gem that they are!

It's not because they don't wish you well, but most likely because they are limited--as in they can't put themselves in your shoes. True empathy can be a lofty goal. Most people don't really know how you feel unless you can clearly articulate your feelings to them. 

Even if/when they do know, the average person has a hard time being objective. In other words, the advice they give you is the advice they would want to hear if they were in your situation. Unless the two of you are a lot more similar than different, it is likely that their advice may be more about what would be best for them than what would be best for you. 

It is only natural for some people. They project what they want for your love life on to you.  For instance, say you have small children and the desire for world travel. Many may say this is too challenging or even impossible because they couldn't imagine themselves as a globe-trotting family. And therefore couldn't picture you doing it either.  

By the way……

If you are interested in what I have to say about traveling with a partner or kids, check out my most recent interview, Episode 94: Keep Your Love Alive With Matchmaker Rachel Russo, on The Unchartered Family podcast.

Another reason your loved ones may give you such terrible advice is because they may be out of touch with the unique challenges you face. This can surely happen if you are single, while they have been out of the dating scene for thirty years. Or if they live in a place in which the dating scene is much better than yours. (I.e Its not NYC--a difficult dating scene for reasons which I'll surely elaborate on more on a Big Apple Stage here.)

If you are reading this and nodding your head in agreement, you'll be just fine. 'Cause you get it. And at the end of the day, if you want to get what you want, you have to do what you want. 

So…….just do you!