Most people are terrified of the idea of being vulnerable by revealing their true feelings to someone they love.
Double that terror if they actually have to start the conversation in person.
Because so many of us like to hide behind text these days....
Actually, its not just the notion of unrequited love that shakes people up.
It is anything that makes them feel judged, not good enough, and like they are about to be rejected.
People fear abandonment.
Whether sharing a different opinion will rock the boat......
Whether they will be left after revealing their insecurities.....
Whether showing their "real" self will be too much for the other person to handle.....
So they don't act like their true selves.
They water down their emotions--like that club used to water down your drinks. They say "everything is fine" when they are really having a crappy day. They make small talk with people on dating apps--people who will likely "bench" them soon. When in a new relationship, they hold back their "crazy" because they think it will push their partner away,
Well, ya know what? I get it. But it is DUMB.
How can having a fear-based mentality and not being ourselves ever make us happy? Okay, so, pretending may make us happy in the short term, but it isn't sustainable.
The truths of the relationship will always come out sooner rather than later.
I vote sooner. (But I live in NYC. Are you surprised?!)
As the recent tragedy in Orlando has reminded us: Life is very fragile. You can't protect the future or how much time you have left on this planet.
So if you love someone: Tell them. Show them. LOVE them.
And whatever you do...........
Don't spend the next twenty years of your life wondering: What if?