Welcome to the unofficial start of summer! With the busyness of the BBQs, weekend getaways, and town parades, let’s take a moment to remember what Memorial Day is all about: An opportunity to honor the brave men and women who have sacrificed so much for the nation many of us call home !
The holiday weekend is an ideal time to express your gratitude for all who have helped create and maintain the freedoms we enjoy in the United States today.
Don’t forget that practicing gratitude primes you for a rewarding love life, too! It is scientifically proven to make you happier, and we all like to be around people with a more cheerful disposition.
Other ways to produce a happy mood and relational bliss this summer?Have FUN! Do the thing you always wanted to do. Try the hobby you wanted to pursue. Take the trip you have been dreaming of going on for years.
I recently shared my top tips for single mothers in a local paper for this past Mother’s Day, but for Memorial Day, that’s all I’ve got! Never underestimate the power of good, old fashioned fun. Everything is lighter in the summer. Maybe the light-hearted version of you is just what you need to attract or reconnect with the love of your life!
If you want to take advantage of Memorial Day savings with Rachel Russo Relationships, please email Rachel@RachelRusso.com before June 1rst for half-price matchmaking, dating, and relationship strategy sessions.
Many young women feel the pressure “to settle down”. Whether the story they imagine unfolding in early adulthood includes a white picket fence or the penthouse, it usually involves a man, a ring, and a child or two—or more. You know, The Fairytale.
But what happens when things change course, and it doesn’t seem like the dream of becoming a mom is anywhere in sight? In other words, what do modern single women do when they are getting past the age where having biological babies is feasible?
More and more are freezing their eggs—which can be a great thing to do, but it is certainly no insurance.
Of course, many turn to online dating apps and get into matchmakers’ databases in hopes of meeting an eligible bachelor before the clock stops ticking. I know this, because I am seeing many women apply to my own complimentary database at my boutique relationship consultancy, Rachel Russo Relationships, every day—and more so, lately, during “Love Month”. Younger women wanting kids. Older women wanting kids. There are a lot of women really trying to meet that man who is on the same page about wanting a family, yesterday.
I feel for those women. I was one of those women—until I wasn’t. Until I decided to take an alternate route. For some brave ladies, there is a new way to find your person—and it is after you have had your baby! As you may know, I took this road less travelled and have lived to write about it.
Last month, a journalist from Yahoo Life reached out to interview me for her piece regarding dating for solo moms by choice. I was happy to see this article with my insights-and those of other solo moms-came out this week, on Valentine's Day. Everything written here --totally relatable to me!
Its so awesome to have a community of other like-minded women who have decided to make this unique-and increasingly more popular-lifestyle choice. A lot of people have been referring me friends who are in the thinking stage. Some have even reached out on social media and hired me for consults.
I am so open to connect with any woman who is contemplating this rewarding and challenging path of having a baby on her own—and worrying what dating looks like after.
Personally, I am fully enjoying my little one, throwing myself into my work, and focusing on my own dating (a little!) later in the game. As for getting to be a woman who is defying society’s expectations-well that’s just the icing on the cake and the result of fighting for my own fairytale!
In honor of Valentine’s Day, I thought I’d share some things I have learned about love:
Got that new moon energy…..new moon in Aquarius came in at 3:55PM EST—just as I had the intuitive nudge to put out a new and inspiring message for all those looking for a shot of hope for their love life!
I’ll be honest: My 2023 did not start off as magically as I would have preferred. In fact, I was so temporarily out of character I didn’t even make an official New Year’s resolution. Or update my blog and newsletter!
Well, onwards and upwards, I’m feeling this new moon energy is going to be transformative for my business in the love industry! I’m feeling confident that I am going to be able to help every single person that comes my way -in some way-for this entire year. That is my intention—to be of service to all who are drawn to working with me in a matchmaking or dating & relationship coaching context. And to learn the lessons that powerful work gives back to me.
I believe those who will be drawn to me will be drawn to me for a reason. I will have something incredibly valuable to offer them. 🙏🏻 Yes! I know it. This new moon is going to help me manifest it.
Too “woo-woo” for you?! Whether you believe in the power of the new moon or not, it can bring transformation to many areas of your life—including dating and relationships.
My top tip: Set the intention for your love life within the next twenty-four hours. Write it down, and you’ll increase the chances of bringing it to fruition.
Oh, and, if you are single and feeling spontaneous? Go on an impromptu first date. At the very least, fill out a profile in my confidential database. I may have a match for you!
The new moon is an ideal time to plant the seed for a new relationship. So start planting. Happy New Moon! ❤️
Originally published in the November edition of Our Town Magazine
Do you ever notice that people start putting things off until the new year—right about now? They may squeeze in doctor appointments in hope of meeting deductibles, but business projects, diets, home renovations, etc., they all begin in 2023.
There’s also a slowdown-but definitely not a lockdown -when it comes to how people do dating, relationships, and marriage during the holiday season.
Sure it is engagement season (no pressure!) and no one likes to be alone during the holidays, but it is also an awkward, anxiety-provoking time that makes some singles, well, just want to stay single.
For the newly dating, the vibe can be high pressure.
Should I buy her a present ? How much do I spend without looking cheap or overly interested? What do I wear to the family dinner? Do I really have to go to this only after a month of dating? Will we spend New Year’s Eve together?
I think its pretty easy to understand why some put dating apps on hold, and others run back into the arms of their ex.
The devil you know is better than the devil you don’t know, right?! Highly debatable, but I digress….
In the matchmaking world, many clients assume everyone is traveling, so we sign contracts for membership now and start fresh in the new year.
For some of the “married folk”—including those who were lucky enough to meet organically or in an AOL chat room twenty-three years ago:
The holidays aren’t a walk in the park either. Let’s just say you wouldn’t be the first person to dread attending your spouse’s annual company Christmas party.
Wait, am I allowed to say Christmas party?
Then there are fights over the finances, the gift-giving, the division of labor, and which family you are spending which holiday with which year.
For couples on the brink of a breakup or divorce, it is really not the most wonderful time of year. Some of you may choose to procrastinate cutting ties with a partner, because you think it is kinder thing to do. While your desire to avoid ruining a holiday is noble, there is no good time to end a relationship—especially when the other party doesn’t welcome its’ dissolution.
Considering the way the holiday season slowdown impacts people-no matter what their marital status-chances are something I’ve shared resonates with you.
If you are wondering what to do, I say: Do what you want during the holidays—and always.
Our love lives aren’t always rainbows and butterflies; cobwebs and nasty bugs can creep in at anytime. Relationship don’t permanently change just because the calendar says it is time to drink eggnog with Aunt Gertrude—in your ugly Christmas sweater.
But they could change if you actually commit to your New Year’s resolution. Life is short, so seize the day. And, you, know, have the happiest of holidays!
Ever have the experience of being burnt out in your love life? Overwhelmed and unenthused doesn’t just apply in the workplace— but in dating and relationships too.
I should know. I have been a matchmaker and dating and relationship coach in the NYC tri-state area for the past seventeen years. I have seen countless singles and couples dispirited when it comes to dealing with modern day matters of the heart.
Couples feeling underappreciated by their partner and stuck in the same old rut—on that hamster wheel that comes with balancing family and career. They find themselves going to the same restaurants, having the same fights, and being disconnected from the reasons why they fell in love in the first place.
As for the singles—it is so much about dating app fatigue! There are so many singles who are stagnant, because they can’t seem to find a meaningful connection--despite all of the options online. They secretly feel like they aren’t good enough, that they are doing something wrong that is leading to being ghosted, put in the friend zone, or taken on a rollercoaster that never leads to a serious commitment.
The struggle is real!
It exits, because most people don’t stop to think about prioritizing happiness in their love life. They’ve stopped scheduling date nights with their spouse. They’ve gotten into relationships by default. They are making decisions that fail to align with their core values. Or they aren’t making decisions at all! They think the right person will come along when they least expect it or that the grass is green somewhere else. They think: When its right, things aren’t supposed to be so difficult, are they?
Wrong! Perhaps, it is time for some reflection, because from societal pressures to the cost of living, to the mental health issues that people are facing from the city to the suburbs, it isn’t so black and white. Your level of happiness-or lack thereof-directly impacts your ability to find and keep a healthy relationship. Sometimes love isn't enough.
Its hard to stay motivated to make the changes you need to so you can have a successful relationship when you are struggling to pay the mortgage, lose the weight, raise the kids, and keep up with your overbooked schedule. I find that most are so caught up in their lives that they don’t make time for love. And, as one of my good friends always said, “If you don’t make time for love, love doesn’t make time for you.”
Could doing less in your daily life actually bring you more? Would slowing down and being present make you more “matchable” or a better match for the one you are with? Could you say “no” to the things that don’t light you up and find more joy in romance?
Maybe, it is time to let the house be a little messier and your inbox be a little fuller. To stop and think about what you really want in love and life.
In honor of the recent National Daughter's Day, I'd like to share not just a photo of my sweet little girl-who I say was born with glitter in her veins- but a bit of hope for all of our daughters today.
The world is changing for women, indeed, and as I referenced in a previous blog—some of the changes aren't so positive. But they aren't all bad.....
In recent years-since the start of the pandemic-the dating landscape has been transformed.
Aside from the obvious trends-including an increase in online dating use and the normalization of “video dates”- there has been a change in the matchmaking industry.
Beautiful, well-educated, working women-moms, ex-wives, and those who never married-are hiring professional matchmakers in record numbers. As a relationship expert with seventeen years of matchmaking and dating coaching experience, I-along with many of my matchmaking colleagues- are finding more women than men are wanting to invest in matchmaking to find “their person”.
Besides running my boutique matchmaking company, Rachel Russo Relationships, I teach a course that I co-developed with the Global Love Institute. It is an online class for entrepreneurs to start up matchmaking businesses that I've taught weekly for over half a decade. Since the pandemic, more of my students are working with female clientele. I've seen colleagues searching for female clients in the private matchmaking industry groups I belong to as well. And, for the first time, I am personally matching an equal number of single men and women.
I was recently asked what I think of this current trend? My response: It is music to my ears!
As a new solo mom by choice- I conceived my adorable baby girl via IVF with donor sperm- I am proud to see that the future of matchmaking, is, in part, female. I enjoy working with strong women who have the courage to be proactive in their love life–matching them with strong men who value and respect them.
As I told Westchester Jewish Life, in a recent article, “It is healthy for both men and women when women don’t conform to rigid gender roles. " Every woman doesn’t want to sit in a matchmaker’s database and wait to be chosen. It is 2022; if she wants to, she can do the choosing.”
Without a doubt, there are definite challenges to being a woman in America today.
As a female empowerment advocate, I see a real need for reform in this country. I think it starts with women caring for themselves and demanding better from their partners, from their employers, from their friends, from their family, and from themselves.
When I learn about the current dynamics in the dating world, I see so many women giving away their power for the chance to be in a relationship with men they perceive as high-quality. They fail to realize a quality man would enhance their power--not diminish it. I am committed to helping women realize this and only seek to introduce them to quality men through my matchmaking agency, Rachel Russo Relationships--and only if they are truly ready for a partnership.
That being said, I am currently doing two things to support this mission. You may be able to help connect me-yes, the ultimate connector, ha-with the right women and men who could help me help other women.
Still with me?
I am excited to announce: I'm planning to conduct a unique social experiment, and I am looking for three single women to participate. I figured I'd put this out there, before I go really public in hopes of finding the right mix of women.
I am looking for women who are:
-Located anywhere in the US, UK, or Canada
- In their late 30s (ideally 38/39) and hoping to find their "person" for marriage in their early 40s
-Coachable- knowing they might have work to do before they find real love
-Willing to share their journey with the other women participating, as well as in a blog, on social media, and press
-Believe in women supporting other women
Please email me at Rachel@RachelRusso.com for more information or if you or women you know are interested.
2. I am still looking for the right match for, "E", one of my most extraordinary female clients. I am looking for spiritual/culturally Jewish men in their 50s and early 60s in the NYC tri- state area. If you are a good connector yourself, here are the details.
Born and raised in Scarsdale, E is from a close-knit Jewish family with loving parents who have been married for fifty-eight years. She remains close with her sister and just adores her nephews.
Fifty-four years young herself, this Westchester- based psychologist and professor decided to take “the road less travelled” both personally and professionally. With a Ph.D from a top university, she’s founded an incredible, successful mental health organization that’s made a huge difference in the the lives of children. Extremely passionate about her work, E has written many papers and given hundreds of talks.
One of her most important gigs: Solo mom by choice to her (now teenage!) daughter. (Yes, I can relate!) What an inspirational role model E is—a trailblazer who lives life on her terms and refuses to get stuck in rigid gender roles. Her positive energy and light shines through to all who are lucky enough to meet her.
A soon-to-be-empty-nester, E is seeking a true partner. At 5’6’’ with a slender and athletic build, he should be able to keep up with her, as she works out regularly with a trainer, hikes, and even paddle-boards. Other interests include dining out, reading, and photography.
Did I mention E loves to travel? A trip to Costa Rica has been one of her favorites. She’d love to collect more stamps on her passport, share common interests, and have a great romance with someone special.
If you know her person, please email me at Rachel@RachelRusso.com A referral fee of $250 will be offered for any dates I set up for E that are a result of your introduction. And if you think you are her person, by all means, please fill out a form in my confidential database for Rachel Russo Relationships here.
'Til then, let's keep trying to make the world a better place by empowering the women in our life.
This week, my article, "Why I Prefer To Date Single Dads" was published by HeyBaby--a new dating app for single parents and people who want to date them.
I don't think I'll be interested in seriously dating until my little Serafina is 1-2 years old-right now we are just about six months and starting solids- but it is fun to think about being able to have wine with dinner--and a side of adult conversation in the near(ish!) future!
I think dating dads has so much appeal. If you are a single woman contemplating their value for your love life or a dad who’d enjoy a boost of self-esteem, read this.
This piece came after another recently published article about how becoming a solo mom by choice would actually help-and not hurt-my love life.
I admit that I was a little worried that it would come across like wishful thinking. This is technically a hypothesis, yes, but I believe it has the potential to be absolute truth for many solo moms-including myself-when the time is right.
I do believe there’s a light at the end of the tunnel in dating and relationships for single moms. Our bundle(s) of joy could potentially also bring six upgrades to our love life. Check this out for all the details!
Meantime, have a happy Memorial Day weekend—whether you are rocking a dad bod, mom bod, or…working on a summer bod!
Have you come across these dating red flags?
I have listed four. Number three is my personal favorite! However, there are basically two types of red flags: Red flags for everyone and red flags for you--based on the type of partner and relationship dynamic you desire.
It is super-important for you to uncover what you really want in a relationship--by uncovering what you don't want. And, if you don't want an unhealthy relationship, you have to learn to identify both types of red flags and avoid, avoid, avoid anyone who raises them.
In the spirit of doing just that...
I’m co-hosting a three part seminar to help singles figure out their red flags, starting on May 4th, with the first, "How To Identify Dating Red Flags: Signs of A Toxic Partner"! I love talking about this stuff.
This is taking place at 7PM, EST, on Zoom with Dr. Legg, owner of a psychotherapy practice called, The Psych Center, that does Telehealth and in-person psychotherapy in NJ.
To register for event: Call 201 606 2529
More info: PsychCenterSeminars@gmail.com
Or, you know, just email me at Rachel@RachelRusso.com and I will provide you with all the details.