We are in some interesting times, indeed, in the United States and globally.
Like many small businesses, at Rachel Russo Relationships, I am trying to find a better way to serve singles who may be concerned about exposure to the coronavirus.
Virtual dating, anyone? Remote coaching sessions to discuss how to actually succeed at a virtual date in an age in which people have forgotten how to talk on the phone?
People have been asking my thoughts on how coronavirus is impacting the dating world. I will start with this: If you are single and think there is ever a good time to hook up with a random stranger from Tinder, it should not be now!
Last week, I wasn't so sure how love lives would be impacted. This week, as I have done more research on the health concerns, have seen the way people and governments are handling this worldwide, and considered the economic consequences:
Yes, I think that some people will be impacted in a considerable way---especially in areas where there has been real exposure.
So, for once, I agree with Tinder, in that they issued a health-comes-first message.
I know a lot of people are panicking and a lot of people are minimizing this. However, for those of us with autoimmune issues, those of us who are older, and those of us who care enough not to spread a disease in their family and community: It isn't always just "wash your hands for twenty seconds".
I was sadden to see that there was a record jump in coronavirus infections in Italy yesterday, and to hear what is going on within the healthcare system there.
As an Italian American, I know that Italians are strong, and I feel they are doing the right thing with country wide lockdowns. I think other countries should consider following their lead, and, that, we in the US shouldn’t be foolish enough to believe that the virus is not a real threat.
We should all do our part to prevent the spread of illness and impact on our communities. Personally, I would not mind being quarantined for a couple weeks if it was going to help. (As long as I have WiFi!) Yes, flirting in 2020 may be: “Anyone want to get quarantined with me?!😉”
Its, for many of us, time to #PrayForItaly and #PrayForTheWorld. So, I ask you to think about how the coronavirus may be impacting people's love lives. Do you have any ideas for how I may be able to better serve you and/or others? Feel free to email me some ideas at Rachel@RachelRusso.com
But, mostly, think of this: Why not prepare for the worst, hope for the best, and, of, course, wash our hands for thirty seconds?
So I have some exciting news to share! At Rachel Russo Relationships, I've recently launched a brand-new product on my Services page: Email Coaching!
I created this for anyone who wishes they could have dating and relationship advice from a professional, at an affordable price, on demand.
If you could really use some extra hand-holding in your love life-and your friends and family aren't cutting it, aren't objective enough, or are sick and tired of hearing your dating mishaps and relationships sagas- I think you are going to love, love, love this!
Check this out: You can can have me in your inbox every single day, answering all of your burning questions! This is a month-to-month-service that you can try out one month at a time for an investment of five hundred dollars. What's included? Other than life-changing advice that can help you cope and actually learn to love your love life--no matter what your status? Well, you can email up to three questions per day, every day if you wish to. I will send you detailed, personalized, responses in a timely fashion--even on the weekends!
Don't like writing? Would you prefer to listen to-instead of read-my advice? You are in luck, because you can alternately send me voice notes, and I'll answer you back--in voice notes.
My current clients are really appreciating this new service-and the accountability it creates-and I am thrilled to extend this special offer to you! If you are ready to get started, you can sign up for Email Coaching here and send your first round of email questions-or phone number for voice notes-to Rachel@RachelRusso.com. If you have any questions about Email Coaching, feel free to message me or schedule a complimentary consultation before signing up.
Can't wait to discover how what I know can help you have everything that you've always wanted--in love!
Can we talk about #HalftimeShow2020?
With a look at social media, I read way too many posts from both men and women-honestly more from men-that included both positive and negative comments on the physical appearance of both JLo & Shakira.
I’m all for free speech, but some of the negative comments from men on my Facebook page caused me to delete some of my “friends”. (The purge felt good!)
Our culture’s hyper-focus on womens’ bodies and overall appearance hurts both women, men, and the state of our romantic relationships.
Of course, it isn’t just men who are criticizing women in this way. Judging by my feed, more men were doing this last night. Maybe its just that more were watching The Super Bowl and posting about it. Maybe women were watching and criticizing privately? I don’t know. But I do know that this form of toxic masculinity is real. And that a lot of women are also guilty of accepting this and making such comments themselves.
When I see women criticizing other women in this way, it is a whole other kind of maddening! As if we don’t get enough criticism from men, we have to do it to ourselves —and publicly while we are at it? This is no bueno.
This type of dialogue is this stuff that helps make women with low self-esteem, poor body image, eating disorders, depression, anxiety, and tolerance for relationship abuse.
This is a good time for me to say once again: We ladies need to support each other instead of tearing each other down!
I am helping to do my part, this Saturday, February 8th, by co-hosting a special event, Galentine’s Day 2020, for single women looking for love, with my friend & colleague, Love Coach Junie Moon.
The event takes place in the Valley & Bloom Lounge in Montclair, from 4-6PM.
We will be sharing all we know that can help women stay away from limiting beliefs, unhealthy behaviors, and toxic men so that they can find and keep a healthy and amazing relationship!
To learn more about our event and buy tickets, check out our the link here.
Sixteen days into 2020, and I have some exciting announcements for you! There will be a lot of changes for me personally and professionally this year and throughout the decade. I am happy to have you along for the ride! If you are not already following my journey, feel free to do so on Instagram or Facebook.
Happy New Year & Best Wishes for "The Roaring 20s" from our family to yours! Also, today is World Introvert Day; so a special shout out to all the introverts among us who are likely dying to recharge after all the craziness of the holiday season!
For the "single" introvert: If you haven't tried professional matchmaking, it could be a dream for you! With personalized introductions, you don't have to have awkward small talk with people you meet at bars or go on draining dates with people you meet online--who look nothing like their photos.
If you are very serious about finding someone special, there are few things better than being proactive about it by hiring a qualified professional to personally handpick, recruit, and vet potential matches for you. Many of us matchmakers, we don’t mess around; background checks are included!
I am currently accepting new clients, but if we are not a “match”, I can happily refer you to one of the matchmakers in my vast international network of love professionals. If you are in the NYC area and aren’t ready to hire a matchmaker but would like to be considered for introductions, feel free to apply to my confidential matchmaking database at www.RachelRusso.com. Curious to learn more? Go ahead, email me!
By the way, if you are curious about the matchmaking industry from a business perspective-and are looking for a career change in the new year-feel free to get in touch. Not only am I still hiring recruiters-and offering everyone generous commissions for referring single friends-but I am still teaching online and live classes with Matchmaking Institute. I will be teaching at The Global Love Conference in NYC this March. More info here.
Meantime, as a reminder: I am offering a New Year's Special Strategy Session for singles, couples, half-couples--anyone who could use some fresh perspective for finding or keeping love. Note: I also do strategy sessions for entrepreneurs interested in matchmaking, and I am happy to extend the offer to you. My Strategy Sessions can be life-changing! And when booked before Jan 20, 2020, they are now twenty-percent off.
If you wish to jumpstart your success in love and life during These Roaring Twenties, click here to learn more, and reserve your spot on my calendar today. Have a healthy, happy, and prosperous New Year!
As the year comes to an end, I am reflecting back on what I have experienced both personally and professionally. While I could tell you all about my alternative medicines, gluten-free everything, and adventures and misadventures in business and love, I'll close off 2019 with one piece of relationship advice for you.
If I could only offer you one nugget of wisdom of creating a beautiful, new beginning for your love life for the next year and decade to come, it would be this.....
Make a real, strong effort to do all those things that you know- deep down-that you must do to achieve your desired outcome in the romance department. Do those uncomfortable things that could propel your forward to meet the right potential partners or strengthen the relationship that you already have. Just do them. Stop procrastinating! It is 2020 for God's sake! Do them now.
To get started pondering what needs to change, ask yourself: What do I need to leave behind? Here are my thoughts on the things everyone could benefit from ditching in the new year:
1. Focusing on the negative about your love life: This will bring nothing but more negativity to your dating/ relationship experience.
2. Holding on to anger from the past: Whether you are carrying around negative feelings toward your ex or your current partner, this is self-sabotage.
3. Clinging to the hope of getting back together with an ex: Don’t hold your breath. If they truly wanted to be with you, they would be with you.
4. Watching your ex’s Insta stories: See # 2.
5. Being unrealistic with your match criteria or having too high of expectations in your relationship: This can keep you single or unhappily coupled for a long, long time.
6. Comparing your love life to that of your parents/siblings/friends/co-workers/exes: You are in competition with no one. And all that glitters isn’t gold, so don’t be fooled by those happily-ever-after social media posts.
7. Ignoring someone you are dating/ in a relationship with because it seems easier than telling the truth: You’ll create a much healthier dynamic if you can learn to get comfortable having uncomfortable conversations.
8. Ghosting: Don't be a coward. Whether you had three dates with someone or spent three years of your life, give them the common courtesy of properly ending the relationship.
9. Expecting the other person to read your mind: Communicate what you want to increase the chances of getting it. No one should have to play guessing games.
Out with the old, in with the new, right?
I know it is easier said than done, and that is why I am offering a New Year's Special Strategy Session for anyone who is interested in getting a little support along the way. My Strategy Sessions can be life-changing! And when booked before Jan 20, 2020, they are now twenty-percent off. If you are truly ready to make 2020 YOUR year-and to stop saying that every year-click here to learn more and reserve your spot on my calendar today.
In the meantime, have a safe and happy New Year's Eve, and best wishes for The Roaring 20s!
Happy Thanksgiving, Everyone!
A few things that I wanted to share in honor of the holiday:
My “attitude of gratitude”: I find that practicing gratitude is one of the best things that we can do to caterpillar our success in love and life! Writing down three things a day that I am grateful for everyday has truly impacted me in a positive way. It has definitely brought me more things to be grateful for, and I encourage you to try it and unlock the door to deeper gratitude for you!
Today, I’m feeling most grateful for my family, my health & wellness, and the fact that I’m in a sustainable and rewarding career that has been all about helping people find & keep love for fifteen years now! (Sometimes, re: the latter, I’m like: Wow. It really is cool that I’ve got to do this for so long! What an honor to help people like this.)
I want to show my gratitude for YOU! Whether you have been following me for years or following me for a day, I am thankful for you! I’d truly be honored to be a part of your journey to finding and/or keeping love. In that spirit, I’m offering two Thanksgiving Day Specials at Rachel Russo Relationships for you. Read on........
From now through Dec 1rst, you can book a Strategy Session for half the price! That’s one hour of coaching-phone or video call-for just $125. Let’s talk!
Want more support from me? The holidays are the perfect time for Email Coaching. You can try one month at twenty percent off when booked before Dec 1rst. That’s $400 for the opportunity to pick my brain everyday via email. If you have a lot of burning questions and could use someone to keep you on track in your love life, this is an incredible value that can be a total game-changer!
For more details on either special offer, visit the link here or email me at Rachel@RachelRusso.com with questions.
Have a fantastic holiday!😘
I attended my cousin's wedding this week in Northern, NJ; I had a wonderful time with family--including my mother and sister, pictured with me here.
Weddings have a way of causing us to reflect upon our own happily-ever-after- or lack thereof- don't they? Do you ever wonder what the secret is to finding a quality partner and creating a sustainable, fulfilling love life?
While I don't have it all figured out, I have a lot of insight on this "secret". The truth is, there are strategies that can help anyone improve his or her love life--no matter who they are or what their age is.
Let’s face it. Many believe that age makes finding love harder. Being in the second half of life and getting “back out there” can feel daunting. I work with many clients in a matchmaking and dating coaching capacity who have struggled to start over as a single in midlife. Getting over exes and breakups is half the battle.
But, gosh, it seems so hard for many to just find someone appealing who offers basic respect and genuine interest these days. If you fall into this category and have been dealing with these types for too long, check out my thoughts on how to move forward here.
With divorce rates skyrocketing and people feeling more dissatisfied in partnership than ever before, and being in midlife after multiple sucky relationships, I understand why one would think it isn’t possible to have a fulfilling relationship let alone find one so late in life. But this isn't true; it is just a limiting belief.
Click here to read more what I have to say about limiting beliefs at this time.
Would you rather hear me talk about how to have dating success in midlife? You can check out my episode on a recent podcast, Midlife Love Out Loud: Your One Stop Love Shop, hosted by my friend and colleague, Junie Moon, the Love Coach. This podcast could be a great resource for you!
Midlife Love Out Loud offers topics for women-which could also be helpful for men-like:
Every profession has those Frequently Asked Questions. In the dating industry, people sometimes think no topic is off limit! I get asked a lot of the same questions over and over, but, I also get asked really fun, unique questions too.
Like in a recent interview, for instance. I was feeling a little like Carrie Bradshaw yesterday, seeing my quote printed in the November 14th edition of New York Post. You can zoom in above for my thoughts on this “self-partnering” trend. Or, make it, much easier and check out the online version of the story here.
Yes, I think this term is an oxymoron. And, no, just because I help people find and keep love for a living doesn’t mean I think there is anything wrong with any woman-or man- being single!
And I love to talk to singles! In my nearly fifteen years working as a matchmaker and dating & relationship coach, singles have been curious about everything--including my own love life. Well, here are the most popular questions that I am currently asked.
1. How did you become a matchmaker?
Okay, in all fairness, I was always asked this one, so it's not unique to the dating scene in 2019. As you can imagine, I have told this story a lot--you may have even heard of it! Cliff Notes:
2005. Out of college. Psychology Major. Craiglist ad. For a "Unique Social Work Opportunity". NYC Startup. Haven't looked back. Although, of course, my career has evolved to including writing, speaking, coaching, teaching, and my newest project: Couple's Therapy and Workshops.
2. What is the best dating app?
Well, that depends on a few things--including age!
Dating does not necessarily get easier as you get older. For many, it gets harder. But it is not impossible to navigate today's dating scene and find someone date-able off an app. (Confession: Although dating apps are certainly not my favorite way to meet a man, I even once got a relationship out of it myself. Thanks, Bumble.)
One thing is for sure: It can only help to be informed of the options and choose the best app for you. If you'd like to learn more, check out this article that was recently published--using some quotes from singles ladies I sent her way!
3. Can you match me up?
Maybe! If you are a male or female in NYC, CT, NJ, or Boston, I might have a client for you. I invite you to apply to my confidential database to be considered for a complimentary introduction. Please note: I only take a handful of clients on at a time. I offer a boutique service at a high price point, so I may not have someone for you at this time. I can keep you in mind though, as long as you are still single.
If you want to do something more proactive, you can invest in a Strategy Session--whether done in person or virtually. In this session, we brainstorm a ton of opportunities for you. If I don't have a match for you, I may be able to introduce you to one of the hundreds of matchmakers I know (through my work with Matchmaking Institute) who could match you! Alternately, I can show you how to be your own matchmaker--whether on or offline.
So there you have it! Want to ask me another question? Shoot me an email at Rachel@RachelRusso.com
If you spent a day in the life of my matchmaker shoes, one of the first things you would notice is this: A lot of people have a lot of irrational thoughts that are most definitely having a negative impact on their dating and relationships.
Just about everyone has these cognitive distortions at one time or another,but some people are extreme and at risk of self-sabotage. Read on for: 4 Irrational Thoughts That Lead To Self-Sabotage In Relationships:
1. Overgeneralization: This is when you make broad interpretations from limited experience. Don't define yourself as awkward just because you had one painfully awkward date.
2. Catastrophizing: Some think their love life requires everyone to go into a national state of emergency! They truly believe they are the only one who has it this bad. If you are one of those people, I have a pep talk for you.
3. Jumping to conclusions: With this flavor of cognitive distortion, people interpret the meaning of an event with hardly any evidence. For instance, I tell my client that the woman I hoped to introduce him to has declined the invitation to meet. He automatically assumes it is because he's too old, and she prefers to date younger. But the truth is, it has nothing to do with that! Be honest with yourself. Do you do this?
4. Disqualifying the positive: You are seriously getting into dangerous territory if you do this in your relationships. When you focus on the negative about your partner-and conveniently forget all the positive-you have a recipe for bitterness and disaster.
Are you guilty as charged? Work on changing your thoughts to improve your love life, and if you don't know how, shoot me an email at Rachel@RachelRusso.com.