​Happy Valentine's Day!  Whether you are single, happily dating, or in a committed relationship, I truly hope that your day is filled with LOVE!
 
As I shared on my social media:  I know today is sometimes a hard day for some of us. Valentine's Day often gets a bad rap as "Singles Awareness Day" or just another "Hallmark Holiday". For some of us: It is JUDGMENT DAY! Will he call? Will he text? Will I get flowers? For others, it is just another day. Cause, you know, we don't need a day to tell us we should love our partners, because that should be every day, and blah, blah, blah....
 
Whatever the case may be, I have a message for you about the point of it all-LOVE-right here.  You see, I believe that the more love you have within, the more love you are able to give back to the world.And that is always a good thing!
 
Want to claim your power in your love life? Claim you free goodie first! I recently put out a very informal little video on how you can learn to let more love into your life--no matter what your relationship status. I just wanted to keep it real-the way love should be- and I invite you to check out.
 
If you want the more formal version-yes, I clean up nice- you can come out to The Great Love Debate to see me on February 19th at City Winery in NYC. Although I won't be on the panel this time, I will be mingling with the crowd and offering my take on modern day love--both on and off camera.  I will be interviewed by Nightline, and they will be filming throughout the night. So don't be camera shy.  This show is SO much fun, and it will teach you lots about how to successfully navigate relationships in 2019. Get your tickets, and come say "hi. I'll be in VIP! :)
 
Meanwhile, if you aren't in NYC but you are in a situation where you aren't as happy as you can be with your love life, I have the perfect offer for you today for some virtual coaching. To be clear, you can take advantage of this even if you are in the NYC area.
 
Right now, I am running a seven day sale on my strategy sessions for all first-time clients who could use dating or relationship advice. I am offering a 50 percent discount to those who book their session before February 21rst here. (That's $125 in savings, total, y'all!)
 
If you want to learn what you can do-step by step-to make the next Valentine's Day your happiest yet, this is your chance. Regardless, I am sending you lots of love today! 

Well, hello, from Del Ray Beach, Florida! 
 So, this is me here at the iDate2019 Dating Industry Conference. I'm happy to be investing in my business and myself.
 
I must say: In addition to enjoying the educational piece of matchmaking and dating industry conferences, I really have fun re-connecting with colleagues that I've known for years, as well as meeting new people who work in the dating and relationship space.
These are my peeps! Well, a lot of these people are my people--but not all of them. That's not only okay; it is the way it should be. 
 
While I truly believe that every person I meet has value and is a new door to a different world--not all doors are meant to be opened by me.  Or you! 
 
It seems obvious, but.....
 
You don't go to the hardware store for milk. Tiffany's doesn't try to sell diamonds to teenage boys. And, as one of my matchmaking colleagues implied today, you don't match "toothless truckers" with attractive, educated, professional women in Manhattan! 
 
As another colleague said in her presentation on matchmaking hacks, people should look and feel like they match up with their partner. (Ever noticed how people start to look more and more like their significant others?) I, too, believe couples should look like they go together in some way. This doesn't mean they must physically resemble each other,  but that its best they have some kind of synergy. Like "two peas in a pod", if you will......
 
Knowing who is like you-who your tribe is- can not only help you achieve happiness in dating and relationships but promote success in business and life in general too.
 
As it turns out, recognizing who is not for you is just as important as knowing who is for you. 
 So draw your line in the sand and never be offended if someone decides you aren't for them in your personal or professional life. To quote my ex-boyfriend: "It is what it is".
 
When you let go of what isn't for you, what is for you will come front and center. 

Whether you are single or in a relationship, you aren't going to just magically improve your love life because you want to. 
 
Just because you have a vision board, just because you have prayed, or just because you know your deserve more than this.....
 
Things don't change unless you are sick and tired of how they are. 
You don't stop being single until you are so over being single that you finally do something that will make a difference. 
 
If your relationship is broken, things won't improve just because you'd like them to. Unless both you AND your partner are fully committed to change, you are just going to get more of that same unsatisfying dynamic. PS: If you aren't willing to WORK at a relationship, stay single.
 
Confession: I learned the latter the hard way, and more than once too! Sometimes, it takes a while for things to sink in, and as they say: The lesson repeats until you learn it. When it comes to trying to work on a broken relationship, giving an ex a second chance, etc., it is crucial to make sure that you aren't fooling yourself.
 
Are you more invested in the relationship than your partner is? Are you doing all the work? Do you want it to work more than he or she does?
 
No matter how "in" you are, it the other person has a foot out the door, the relationship has a shelf life. If you are the one with your foot out, kindly let the other person go. Don't hold on for selfish reasons-out of comfort, loneliness, etc-when you know a relationship is wrong for you. The relationship will not be right for either of you unless you both have a strong desire to change.
 
You must also both have the ability to work through your issues. Is it realistic that things could change enough for you to both be happy? Ideally, you'd have evidence that change is possible before you waste one more second in brokenness. There is always a risk in love, but, in my experience, giving even a fractured relationship another go on a "chicken wing and a prayer" is a risky, risky business. Protect your heart and invest wisely, my friends! 
 
But, if all else fails, and your heart gets broken.......Don't worry, life will go on.
 
I am saddened by all the people who give up on love after a bad breakup, abuse, divorce, addiction, or any other trauma. And I get it. It is hard to move on. However, I truly believe it IS possible to heal your heart and get over even the worst things you can imagine! This is why I'm so excited to support Jacinth Headlam, award-winning actress and motivational speaker, with her new book, Love After. 
 
Next month, I will be participating in her NYC Book Launch Event! I will be making a special guest appearance, giving a brief talk, and selling copies of my own book, How To Get Over Your Ex: A Step By Step Guide To Mend A Broken Heart Italian American Style, at her launch party in Brooklyn, on Feb 9th. For more info & tix, go here.  
 
To stop fooling yourself and get real about transforming your love life, book a complimentary coaching consultation with me today! 

Love. Everyone wants it. But not everyone has it. Is there a code to live by that could bring more love into your life? If only you could crack it....

While there's no universal recipe for attracting or keeping love, adopting a healthy lifestyle can help you create healthier relationships. In general, a healthy lifestyle will have you feeling more in control of your every day. "Healthy" isn't just about reducing sugar or doing cardio thirty minutes per day--though it is worthwhile for most of us to consider doing these things!
 
Healthy is a state of mind. How do you get there? There are a lot of ways. My own personal code is ever evolving. Here are a few pieces to it that work for me. If you give them a try-for thirty days or more-I think they will work for you too!
 
Have an AM routine, so that you can win the day! Think of your priorities first before you start answering all of the emails and worrying about what everyone else wants from you. Note: If you are single, checking three dating apps before you even get out of bed probably won't put you in a positive, productive mindset. What do you need to do today? Focus on you.
 
Always choose to act with love and kindness. I'm sorry, but you can't attract a happy relationship if you are the kind of person who is mean to waiters! Use your love muscle regularly--not just when you come across your (potential) love interest. If you don't use it, you will lose it. You can't control the circumstances around you, but you can always treat others with respect. #SpreadTheLove
 
Don't settle for less. In other words, be conscious of how you are teaching people to treat you. If you accept bad behavior again and again, the bad behavior will continue. Love yourself more by removing toxic people from your life, and a healthier romantic love will follow.
 
What do you think of my basic code? Tell me about the code you live by. Has it brought more love into your life?

So, that's an image of me, today, and it marks my last social media post of 2018. I decided its time for a little detox from social media and email--just until after the first of the year. Trust me, I got this....
 
Back in 2017, I was given a scholarship for a week-long healing retreat, that turned out to be quite the experience! Part of the deal: For seven days, there was no contact with the outside world. No Books. TV. Music. Calls. Emails. Texts. Or Social Media. Because the goal was to look within and experience the present with a bunch of strangers who became friends....
 In case you are wondering, it was amazing!
 
I did the retreat mid-year, but in retrospect, the end of a year is the perfect time to do a retreat or detox of some kind. Its the ideal opportunity to get quiet, to reflect on your goals for the new year, and to, you know, disappear.
 
By disappear, I don't mean GHOSTING people! Because as I recently shared, that is one dating trend that I'd love for us to get rid of in 2019.
 
Actually, I have a lot to say about ghosting, and I just finished off the work year by doing a fun interview on an important topic with my friend & colleague, Mike Goldstein. Before I peaced  out on 2018, I wanted to take a moment to share this with you. Check out "Why Do Men That Claim They Want Commitment Disappear?" on YouTube. Clearly, this one is for the ladies, but we go deep into the topic and the gender differences, and I believe men can benefit from listening too! 
Speaking of which...
 
Ladies, if you're looking to find a quality man (who would never ghost you) in the new year, please don't hesitate to apply to my confidential database for introductions to amazing men--at no cost to you!
 Gentleman, I will be taking on new matchmaking clients in 2019, so I invite you to contact me if you are interested in having an experienced matchmaker find compatible ladies for you! 
 
Of course, I coach both men, women, and sometimes work with couples too, so I invite you all to schedule a complimentary consultation if you are in the market for a dating or relationship coach. 
 
Also, the social media detox. Give it a try now. You'll thank me later.

Ever since I was a little girl, I always liked to ask people questions. Some things never change, as I continue to ask away in both my professional and personal life.
Note: I think The 36 Questions are totally fair game for Date #1!

Today, I have five questions for you--questions that could reveal really meaningful answers. The ones that could truly make a difference in your love life--no matter what your status. 
Last week I urged you to do these two things for your love life before Jan 1, so I figured I might as well help your cause. 

If you are serious about getting what you want in the romance department, grab a pen and paper and write down your responses to the following:
 
1. How do you want your love life to look going forward in 2019 and beyond? Bonus points if you can envision it all with clear detail!
 
2. What are your deal breakers and boundaries for your relationship or relationship-to-be? You do have some non-negotiables, right?
 
3. Are you satisfied with your life overall; if not, what isn't working for you? How can you change it? The not-so-secret-secret: If you are otherwise ******* miserable, a relationship alone won't change that.
 
4. Do you have unresolved emotional issues from past relationships? Nothing can sabotage like an attachment to an ex.....
 
5. Do you have decent relationship skills?  The bar is set pretty low these days, so if you know how to communicate with more than a smartphone, resolve conflict, and generally function in partnership, you are ahead of the game.
 
So what did the five questions say about you?
If you learned something that you'd like to discuss in a coaching context, don't hesitate to book a complimentary consultation today.